I have twins. They are 16. I share custody. I pay their health insurance, about $2K a month and I live in a small very well off residential LA suburb little upstairs, converted attic $3K a month. One week on and one week off, I have them. The last 8 years. Give or take.

From day one, 16 years ago, they consumed my being. All I became was a machine to raise them.

Somewhere along lines I missed my course. Divorce and a recovering concussed human. Getting intertwined with a 20-30 year old still guiding themself all while becoming into my own. Seeing my mother pass way, grandmother, uncle and cousin. A pandemic and insurrection. Now an older human making six figures a year with no house. Lost in a sea of others with one mind set. How to retire with as much as possible. I got that one thing at least.

The challenge has not ended. I struggle internally to figure them out. I am misguided and lose sight. How do I give them the skills to succeed and not struggle their whole life? I try to raise them and selfishly look at myself as an individual who no longer has a partner….how did I lose sight of raising my twins?

So as it seems my focus goes back into them. Thankfully and with thy Lord’s grace, I may find a way in these their last few years.

I raise twin 16’s. I am capable.