Last night I woke up at 3, or 4? I am unsure. I just laid in bed in and out. I got-off to old rope memories, twice. The second time was pretty magical. I was breathing heavy and left holding my magic wand like my lover. Usually that helps me fall back to sleep, but I just drifted in and out.
I took as second look at what I wrote last night, the last paragraph about breathing is at a total mind loss. I read it and I thought she had wrote that in it. Like a thoughtful gesture of kindness to me. Got I felt desperate to think she wrote that on my blog. That’s not what you get when you break up it.
I must be losing it. The pill really made me spacey and I have trouble remember laying down. I am unsure if it is a good or bad thing. It helps me fall asleep only. And it helps me write me subconsciously I noticed
“Breath Delilah Breath.” Someone in my head is helping me. If I were spiritual I’d say it was the Jesus (LOL), maybe I can just say it is another part of me in a duplicate Universe going through this with me.
A welcomed thought, both of us can make it together.
I know what that was. It was her voice in my head giving me reassurance I need in life. It came out of my subconscious. She was good at that. Driving home last night and especially now, I have collectively concluded I need to learn about who I am and seek a councilor. I don’t know who I am and need. I act like it, but I don’t.